My Husband or My God

  A study was just published that indicated women need more sleep than men.  It said that women become angry and depressed, have increased pain, and are more susceptible to strokes if they don't have the sleep that they need.
  This reminded me of two things, the period of time in my life when I was depressed because I had children with chronic ear infections and didn't get enough sleep, and a good hearted woman who recommended that women get up when their husbands get up and go to bed when they go to bed.
   It is the second item that I would like to address. The good hearted woman is Debi Pearl, wife of Michael Pearl, and author of Created to be His Help Meet.  It was not until I was married for some time that I was introduced to Debi's book.  However, I was introduced to her "theology" before I was ever married.
  As a young woman, I attended a church where the focus was, "wives submit".  Nothing wrong with that, except, I don't ever remember hearing the corollary, "men love your wives as Christ loved the church".  The church was dominated primarily by women (red flag), especially on Sunday and Wednesday evenings, so perhaps one could say the pastor was targeting the majority.
  Because of these teachings, I went into my marriage with my eyes totally focused on my husband, not God.
My husband happily and selfishly took advantage of the situation.  He has since repented. Having said that,  after so many years of "worshipping" my husband, I am trying to find my way.
   I am fully aware of the fact that, not only does the Bible say I am to submit to my husband, it also says the woman was made for the man, not vice versa.  What it doesn't say is that I have to lose my personhood or that my husband is to be my sole focus in life.  My focus is to be on the Lord.  "Thou shall have no other gods before me."  After all, what is worship, if it is not focus? At the same time, I am to arrange my life under the headship of my husband.  I get that.
   I suppose after twenty-nine years of marriage, I should have this all figured out, but I don't.  Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to scan Created to be His Help Meet, again.  It really does have some good things to say, and I'm well aware of the fact that I fall far short of being the perfect wife. This time, I'll pray for God's wisdom to help me sort through it all before I even begin.

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