Mama Knows Best

  While my daughter Tabitha was here with her family the other weekend, my husband had a cold.  He spent most of the day on the recliner, sleeping.  For two nights, I could tell his temperature was up while he slept beside me.  He took zinc and cough drops and never went to the doctor.  Generally, we don't in such a case.
   This morning Tabitha called, wondering if she should take Matthan, my grandson, to the doctor.  He has the same thing.  The fact that she calls me at these times is rather humerous because she is an RN and I have no medical training.
  She said that even though he is still miserable, and his temperature is still elevated, she thinks he's getting better.  I asked how he had slept through the night, and she said he had done better than the previous night. My recommendation was that she not take him to the doctor just yet, but having said that, I added a caveat - "You're his mother.  You know what is normal for him." 
  When Tabitha was young, she and two of her siblings had chronic ear infections.  Initially, they put her on antibiotics, but I noticed she "just wasn't herself" whenever she took them.  I felt a little silly telling the doctor.  After all, how could antibiotics change your behavior?  I did, and he listened.  He told me, "You are her mother.  I don't know what would cause her to behave differently, but if you say she does, she does."  From then on, he stayed away from antibiotics and gave her sulfa drugs.
  Time passed and she outgrew her ear infections.  Then, as a teenager, she had a need to go on antibiotics.  Since it had been a long time since she had taken them, I forgot about the earlier reaction.  A day or two into her treatment, she told me she felt like an elephant was sitting on her chest.  I took her to the ER.  Her vitals were a mess.  From that point on, they have avoided some antibiotics with her.
  Some doctors are arrogant.  I once took Tegretol and started having chest pains.  The doctor scoffed at me.  Since Tegretol worked well for me otherwise, I retried it at a later date.  I had the same problem.
Can you imagine his reaction if he had been Tabitha's doctor?  If he was going to discount what I told him was happening to me, how much more would he discount my noticing a behavior change in Tabitha.  Surely, he would have said the two were unrelated.
  My son Ben got his first ear infection at a month old.  He continued to have them until, at one year old, he was given tubes.  A week or two after he got his tubes, he acted like he had an ear infection.  I made an appointment at the doctor and while we were in the waiting room, he acted as normal as apple pie.  I felt like a complete fool.  Surely, he was fine and they were going to wonder what in the world I was doing there since he had gotten tubes.  Well, the fact is, he did have an ear infection. 
  Ben was by far the sickest of my children but able to tolerate pain well.  When he was sick he didn't become whiney and miserable.  It's hard to keep Ben down.  And so, when he had a double ear infection and pneumonia, and became limp as a dishrag, no one had to tell me it was an emergency.  I knew. 
  When my daughter, Elizabeth, had an immune deficiency disease, I took her to our family doctor.  They said she had C-diff and put her on an antibiotic.  After she finished the antibiotic she still had diarhea, so they said she now was lactose intolerant.  I changed her diet but it didn't make a difference.  Then they suggested pediatric diarhea, which comes from too many sweet drinks.  I knew that wasn't the case. 
  Finally, I told my husband, "I'm done with them".  We took her to a pediatric gastroenterologist in Hershey and she had an upper GI endoscopy.  They made the correct diagnosis.
  Mom, you are the expert on your child.  If you have a doctor that won't listen to you, go to someone who will.  If they make you feel stupid, inferior, or responsible for something that you sense is beyond your control, you're dealing with arrogance.  Don't tolerate it!  If they seem to be just grasping at straws, insist on a specialist.  Don't let any doctor bully you, cause mama knows best.


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